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Rooting for Susan Boyle…and Love the Second Time Around

April 26, 2009

As Susan Boyle demonstrated last week, everyone loves an underdog. Someone who keeps the dreams of youth alive, despite the growing pile of bricks in life’s middle-aged backpack. Today I celebrated the wedding of a couple in their fifties, as their “fifty-something” friends, their seventy and “eighty-something” parents, cried for joy, danced and rejoiced in their renewed dreams of love. And like Susan Boyle, I’m sure that this couple will defy the long odds for survival that second marriages face (of a 60% incidence of divorce). They’ll beat these odds, not because they’re particularly lucky. Neither was lucky the first time, with partners who played really unfair. No, they’ll beat the odds because each has moved beyond blame, has worked hard not to be defined by their past marital injuries, has chosen being alone, even for years at a time, rather than letting loneliness choose for them. They’ll beat the odds because each has spent a few solid years truly knowing each other; knowing that their values mesh, knowing that their families and children from former marriages mesh, knowing how to resolve their differences in a constructive manner. And it’s not just a maturity that comes with turning 50–something many of us embrace with a mid-life crisis.  It’s a relationship wisdom that comes from knowing and embracing the struggle, and the possibilities of grace, growth, and happiness that relationships can bring. Marguerite and Mark–a long, loving and grace-filled marriage.  Thank you for the privilege of witnessing your dream, and everyone’s.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Jane permalink
    April 27, 2009 9:43 pm


    I am still smiling from all of the goodness about the wedding. Good friends, good food, good karma! All around a great couple.


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